im tired of waiting...

well...there is something that i called routine for me...just like eating...but...

my other routine is...

~~~watching anime...

~~~reading comics...

~~~playing

~~~wandering

~~~running-running

~~~laughing

~~~never think much of anything...and so on...

im so tired of all this, but i cant change it...why?

im tired of waiting...however...

this is me...my mentality seems childish and never grow up...

never happen to think as a wise man (who would think of having his own family, to have better financial planning, well occupation, better future and banyak la....) but im not...

warning!!! this is not an excuse to say that i am a geek or a freak.....no! im not!....its just my other side of me that is still in development...when ive done building it, you'll see a nearly perfect man come out of me...(there is no perfect man or human in this world except for our prophet Nabi Muhammad S.A.W)trust me, you'll see it one day...insyaAllah...

the truth is...im just a little bit late behind the others to be a full matured man...

and still waiting for the right time to evolve...i hope i can la...hehe...

change to be better x salah kn...

...................................so, harap2 la aku akan berubah gak suatu hari nanti...whats important now is, im happy with myself...yes im happy...

...................its just i need to change to create myself in the society...

im not a child anymore...............................

.....................................thats for sure....

my face against the society...

what about my face? there has nothing wrong with it...but...just read below...

~~wei, tengok abg tu, hensem la...

~~ko tengok mamat tu, muke jambuuuu je...

~~hei bro, i thought you're chinese before...

~~laaaa...kalo muke cam tu mesti lembik punye la!...

~~muke die licin la, putih lagi tu...gune pencuci muke ape ek?

~~dah muke mcm setan, perangai pun same je la!...

~~ni mesti playboy ni...

......an so on la...i got that a lot...memang sakit hati tp.......

i'm happy that Allah has given me this face...

a face alone that would make as much as first impression by the society...

-im so thankfull...though the society would never realize that having a face like this is getting as much as burden with the same amount with the happiness...

-and i never asking for sympathy because the happiness of it is at the same level with the burden which is letting me to go through the day and keep on...

-there is no way for me to shut every mouth, so i train myself to accept any compliment and rejecting the bad talk of people...

anyway, you wont get to know a person based on the first impression alone...

its not fair to judge a person that you dont know much, that you never even talk to before, and so on...just accept me with my face like this, whether you like it or not because its what Allah has choosen for me...im one of His creation...only he has the right to judge me...so, beware with what you're going to say...especially regarding to my face....

the truth of my face revealed...

am i a joker???

Joker?What is a joker?

1. A person who makes jokes.
2. (slang) A funny person
3. A jester.
4. A playing card that features a picture of a joker (that is, a jester) and that may be used as a wild card in some card games.
5. An unspecified, vaguely disreputable person.

Am i a joker???

i like to see people happy...

i like to make them laugh...

i like to make myself funny...

that's why i make a joke...

So, am i a joker?

seems like i hate this side of me...

however, i cant change it drastically because i think people like this side of me...

for me, my silliness is the only way for me to be connected to them...

this personality is a barrier for my face to shine (a handsome man with a macho style) - in dream...lol

got to accept myself???still in dilemma....

to be continue...

Welcome to my blog...

Sbnrnya aku pun x tau nk isi apa dlm blog ni...no idea at all...tba2 je tgn aku ni gtl nk buat blog...so aku decide to make it as a blog for anyone who knows me but the truth is they still dont know me better...

About me...(details)

-This is when u should angguk2 while reading...

~~~~~PROUDLY SAID THAT I AM A VERY POYO PERSON...NOBODY CAN STAND ME EVEN FOR A SECOND...I LIKE TO TALK STRAIGHT TO THE POINT AND HONEST EVEN IF IT WOULD MAKE THE PERSON ANGRY OR ASHAME OF HIM/HERSELF...WHICH MEANS THAT I DONT KNOW HOW TO 'JAGA HATI'...NOBODY WOULD LIKE TO BE MY BESTFRIEND BECAUSE THE ONE YG PALING RAPAT NGAN AKU ADALAH ORG YG MENDAPAT LAYANAN PALING BURUK DARI AKU(BUKAN DISENGAJAKAN)...HAVE NO FEELING TO ANYTHING HAPPENS TO THE OTHERS...LIKE TO JUAL IKAN (SELFISH)... LIKE TO SING EVEN IF I DONT KNOW THE LYRICS...UNFRIENDLY...TAHAP KEDEKUT IN 80%...DONT REALLY LIKE TO SMILE OR GIVE ANY SEDEKAH...DONT LIKE SOMEONE WHO LIKES TO MEMINTA-MINTA...EGOISTIC...MY FACE WILL TURN RED EVERYTIME I ANGRY, SHAME OR VERY HAPPY...HAVE A CHINESE LOOK FACE(SOMETIMES I LIKE AND SOMETIMES I DONT)...CAN LAUGH IN A BIG, SCARY AND UGLY WAY...AFRAID/SHY TO TALK TO STRANGERS(EVEN A NEW FRIEND IN A SCHOOL OR ANYWHERE)...A JOKER(THAT JOKE HAVE ABILITY TO HURT SOMEBODY'S FEELING)...LOW CONFIDENCE LEVEL ESPECIALLY WHEN EVERYONE'S EYE IS WATCHING ON ME...I LOVE MYSELF...CANT AFFORD TO SEE SOMEONE EYES WHILE TALKING...CANT SLEEP WITH THE LIGHT IS ON...DONT LIKE TO EAT SPICY FOOD...DONT LIKE CARBODINATED DRINKS...A VERY SENSITIVE MAN BUT NEVER SHOW IT...HATE IT WHEN THE GIRLS SAID KAWAIE TO ME BECAUSE I FEEL LIKE A WEAK MAN...DONT TRUST ANYONE...CHEAP WITH THE WORD 'SORRY'...AND MANY MORE...

-This is the truth why i am becoming as above, u can decide nak caye ke x...

~~~~~~I DONT WANT PEOPLE TO THINK OF ME AS A WEAK PERSON PHYSICALLY OR MENTALLY...I ALWAYS FEEL SORRY EVERYTIME I HURT SOMEONE'S FEELING BUT I NEVER SHOW...I LIKE TO TALK BAD OF MYSELF TO MAKE PEOPLE AVOID ME SO I WONT HURT THEM(BUT IT IS NOT A PERMISSION FOR SOMEONE TO TALK BAD OF ME)...I SALUTE ANYONE THAT CAN STAND MY ATTITUDE AND ALWAYS GIVE FORGIVENESS TO ME...I LOVE MY FAMILIES AND FRIENDS EVEN IF I ALWAYS SHOWED THE OPPOSITE ATTITUDE TO THEM(AS I HATE THEM)...I WONT SHOW MY FEELING TO ANYBODY BECAUSE I NEVER TRUST THEM(THAT'S WHY PEOPLE AROUND ME DONT TRUST ME EITHER)...I CAN BECOME SO STINGY BECAUSE I AM A POOR PERSON, I DONT WANT TO ASK MONEY FROM MY PARENTS, AND I HAVE AN INVESTMENT FOR MY FUTURE PLAN(FOR A MONTH, A YEAR OR FOREVER)...I TREAT MY BESTFRIEND THE WORST ATTITUDE I HAVE BECAUSE I WANT THEM TO ACKNOWLEDGE ME THE WAY I AM, NOT CHANGING ME TO BE SOMEONE ELSE...I WILL BECOME A VERY SELFISH AND POYO TO A SELFISH AND POYO PEOPLE...IT TAKES A VERY LONG TIME FOR ME TO FORGIVE...I ALWAYS DREAMING TO BE SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE SOMETIMES I CANT HANDLE 'THE GIFT' THAT ALLAH HAS GIVEN TO ME(ESPECIALLY MY FACE), BUT IM REALLY THANKFULL...I WILL FEEL BAD EVERYTIME I CHEAT(FOR A VERY LONG TIME, UNTIL I CAN FORGET IT OR SOMETIMES I REVEAL THE TRUTH)...DAN BANYAK LAGI LA...

NI LA PENGENALAN KPD DIRI AKU...KALO ADA YG X SETUJU, AKU X KISAH...THAT MEANS U DONT KNOW ME WELL...THOUGH SOMETIMES I CANT UNDERSTAND MYSELF, ONLY ALLAH AND MAYBE THE PEOPLE AROUND ME KNOW...